


Void.

by allinadayofiwaoi



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Bottom Oikawa Tooru, Boys Kissing, Crying, Declarations Of Love, Falling In Love, First Love, Fluff, Gay, Happy Ending, Humor, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru Fluff, Kissing, LGBTQ Themes, Light Angst, Love, M/M, Mild Sexual Content, Mutual Pining, Older Characters, POV Iwaizumi Hajime, Pining, Pining Iwaizumi Hajime, Romance, Sad Oikawa Tooru, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Top Iwaizumi Hajime
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-27
Updated: 2020-12-27
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:49:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,583
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28365690
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/allinadayofiwaoi/pseuds/allinadayofiwaoi
Summary: "Happy Birthday, Hajime!"Hajime stared intently at the object in his hand that had arrived at his doorstep in a small envelope.Iwaizumi shook his head; a simple Happy Birthday text like every other year would have sufficed.
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru
Comments: 6
Kudos: 88





	Void.

**Happy Birthday, Hajime!**

Hajime stared intently at the object in his hand that had arrived at his doorstep in a small envelope.

Iwaizumi shook his head; a simple Happy Birthday text like every other year would have sufficed. What was in this pen drive?

Sighing, he flicked the pen drive into his bed, he’d look at it another time. He shrugged on his trench coat and stepped out, he had a brunch to get to.

~

Kaneo Yuda was waiting for Hajime, a slight pink hue splashed prettily across his cheeks and nose due to the cold. Iwaizumi smiled. This was one of his many attempts to move on from the boy that had left him. Hajime never stopped him, knew that Oikawa had to do this, he had to get away or he’d never have been happy. As much as it hurt Hajime, he didn’t think he was enough to keep Oikawa home, his aspirations simply too girthed to be able to achieve here in Japan. Iwaizumi wouldn’t dare hold Oikawa back from his true potential. Oikawa was a force to be reckoned with, born to be a public figure, here to dazzle in front of the world. That was his true calling.

Iwaizumi’s true calling, however, was being beside said man, alas, that was not possible, which is why he found himself aged 27, still very much single, on the endless hunt for something that could even come close to what he once had with Oikawa.

Iwaizumi wasn’t just some nobody either, he was a popular bachelor, anyone involved in sports knew about Iwaizumi Hajime, the man that went to California and came back home to Japan to join the national team as their Athletic Trainer. He was one of the best in the industry and this caused him a few hardships, Hajime was not used to the spotlight, wasn’t used to being kept up on a pedestal of an unreachable, untouchable, cold-hearted man. At least that’s what most thought of him, what with his horrible dating habits and crude demeanor. People were yet to understand the type of man he was, everyone except Oikawa and his own family. 

Every man that came after Oikawa was just... not him. Iwaizumi had cut all his relationships short, hence being cast off as some cruel player. He had made up quite the reputation of a heartbreaker; something he was anything but, he was just _heartbroken_. So, he was surprised when he found himself agreeing to meet his former high school teammate for a date.

Iwaizumi didn’t know why he had said yes, maybe because he was so lonely, has been since his Tooru had left him. Constantly trying to find someone to fill the void in his life was going horribly sideways, no one quite fit into his lifestyle, no one comprehended why he was the way he was, no one understood that his quips were out of endearment.

He just thought Yuda would be different, more understanding of Iwaizumi’s character. Afterall, they had been in the same class and Volleyball team throughout middle and high school.

He looked up at said man after sitting down opposite of him. Yuda looked... different, good different. He no longer had hair that looked like an unruly flop on his head. It was styled in that messy but quaffed sort of way. Iwaizumi’s gaze travelled to the man’s arms that were resting on the table. _He definitely had grown up_ , Iwaizumi thought.

“Iwaizumi-san!” Yuda greeted, his eyes shining as he waved ecstatically as Iwaizumi approached him.

“Hey Yuda, hope the café wasn’t too inconvenient to find”. Iwaizumi couldn’t help but smile at the man in front of him, his aura was just too uppity to be sulking around.

“Nah, it was pretty easy to spot.” Yuda had changed, he looked happier. The crinkles by his eyes suggested that he smiled a lot more now, Iwaizumi was glad his classmate was so happy with life. He pushed down the memories that resurfaced, the photos Oikawa had clicked of them, Iwaizumi with crinkles by his eyes, a healthy blush coating his face. From back when he was the one in Yuda’s shoes, smiling and laughing at Oikawa’s antics.

The date had gone okay, Yuda really liked Iwaizumi, it was obvious. It was better than most dates Iwaizumi had gotten himself into. But it was still so painfully mediocre, there was no spark. Yuda was attractive, but things with him didn’t sit right. _If you keep comparing everyone to Oikawa, you’ll be forever alone,_ his conscious reprimanded him. Maybe Iwaizumi just ought to stop looking for people.

It was always the same toxic cycle; some poor sap would reach out to Iwaizumi and he would reply if his eyes were drawn to the man. They’d plan a date and most times than not; it would go well. This is where Iwaizumi would start comparing. _How much better would it have been if he was with Oikawa instead?_ And everything would go downhill, Iwaizumi would overthink himself into a dark pit and instantly cut ties with whoever he was talking to.

He sensed the same thing happening with Yuda, as sweet as the boy was, he didn’t mesh well with Iwaizumi, he wasn’t cocky, he wasn’t flirty, he wasn’t touchy-feely, he wasn’t outspoken. Iwaizumi should just go ahead and accept his fate.

A 27-year-old man, never been in love for the second time. All his first times had haunted him too much. No, no, it was more like he had been so happy, so content that it was unforgettable. And Hajime was man enough to accept that he’d never have what he had with Oikawa with anyone else.

He picked up some groceries after his date and headed back home.

Was it sad that it was Iwaizumi’s 27th birthday and all he had done today was go on an almost useless date? He’d received presents from his family, Makki and Mattsun and of course, the root of all his problems and misery, Oikawa Tooru. He didn’t really have anything to do so he’d just consorted to opening all his gifts.

He smiled, filled with love for his mother as he inspected his new, hand-knitted light teal blue sweater with a little volleyball that would evidently rest on top of Hajime’s right pec if he wore it. Then there were little things like his favourite vintage CDs from his dad and a box full of his favourite junk food accompanied with a Godzilla plushie from Mattsun and Makki.

The athletic trainer in him was wincing as he tore open a bag of sugar gummies, popping one into his mouth and chewed loudly. He lazily walked over to where his speaker was, switching it on and playing his Alternative playlist, shimmying his hips to the beat. He walked over to his bed, sinking into the comforts of it and dug his phone out of his pocket to go on Instagram. He had so many notifications, lots of people wishing him a Happy Birthday.

They must think Iwaizumi was out celebrating his special day. It’s not like Iwaizumi didn’t have friends, not like they didn’t invite him out for a drink, not like they didn’t offer to treat him to dinner, not like they didn’t want to bring a cake over to Iwaizumi. He just didn’t want to be the center of attention. It would be exhausting and why would Iwaizumi willingly ruin a whole day for himself? Why was your birthday supposed to be any different from any other normal day? It didn’t make any logical sense in Iwaizumi’s head. But don’t get him wrong, he loved anything to do with presents, it brought him an almost child-like sense of joy.

He saw that Hanamaki had posted a picture of them from back when they were in high school, wishing Iwaizumi a Happy Birthday. The bunch were lounging around in the court after practice. Iwaizumi’s eyes instantly zeroed in on Oikawa who had his head on Iwaizumi’s lap, his eyes looking up at Iwaizumi with that look he only directed at the shorter boy. Said shorter boy was seemingly in the midst of an animated conversation with Kunimi who, for once seemed interested in _something_. Those were the days, things had been so much simpler, most importantly for Iwaizumi though, him and Oikawa were actually dating then. Albeit unknown to others. 

He moved in his bed to get comfortable, to admire the picture some more. He buried his head into his feather stuffed pillow, moving into fetal position when something pricked his back. He shuffled around trying find the object until his large hands found something rectangular. He brought it up to his face and he winced in recognition. The pen drive that Oikawa had couriered to him this morning hung heavy in his palm.

Iwaizumi was conflicted.

A part of him really didn’t want to risk the contents, it would probably make his day miserable. But the other part of him, the part that longed for anything from his past lover, was urging him into plugging that damned pen drive into his laptop. Not to mention, Hajime’s curiosity was high off rails, he’d get around to checking what’s inside someday.

Huffing, he got up to grab his laptop and switched off his speakers in the process.

His heart was racing as he opened the pen drive’s contents.

There was a three-minute video named **Hajime** and another document.

Iwaizumi braced himself before he opened the video.

Immediately, a song started playing. He recognized it in a heartbeat. Oikawa had really _gone there._

Before the lyrics commenced, a message played out on his screen.

**_Happy Birthday Iwa-chan, I love you_** _,_ was all it said.

_I got a heart, and I got a soul, believe me I will use them both._

Iwaizumi’s heart melted when he saw what was happening on screen. It was an old video Tooru had probably collected from his mum. They were young, very young actually, probably around three years old. Oikawa was trying to tickle a very grumpy looking Iwaizumi who seemed unfazed with the others’ efforts. That was until Tooru stuck his little tongue out, making faces so he could cheer Iwaizumi up. Baby Iwaizumi had finally cracked a grin, even letting out a small giggle. 

_We made a start, be it a false one, I know, Baby, I don't want to feel alone._

The next clip was from when they were older, the video rattling as whoever was filming the video settled down from their motions. Iwaizumi had his arms wrapped around Oikawa’s skinnier frame. Oikawa was clutching onto his best setter award, bawling his eyes out of pure joy. Iwaizumi’s eyes seemed to be shining, more than ecstatic for his best friend’s success. His hand was running comfortingly up and down the other boy’s back, patting in the process of it all.

Iwaizumi fondly recalled that day, celebrating after the victory. They had both gotten to back Oikawa’s house in record time, where Oikawa’s mum had a cake waiting for her son. The whole family and Iwaizumi had rejoiced when Oikawa cut into a small cake with a haphazardly frosted volleyball smack dab in the middle of it. Oikawa had ignored his family, turning over to face Iwaizumi so he could have the first bite, claiming that his Iwa-chan deserved the cake as much as he did. Iwaizumi, flattered, had actually complimented his best friend on how hard he had worked, how he deserved the award and how he’d always have Iwaizumi by his side, so Oikawa won’t ever have to be alone. Those were words that had spewed out without caution or deeper thought. Life as kids had been a breeze, he should have appreciated his time with Tooru more.

_So kiss me where I lay down, my hands pressed to your cheeks, a long way from the playground_ _._

This time, rather than videos, there were a stream of pictures of them together. Oikawa making funny faces at the camera while Iwaizumi just looked bored, Oikawa and Iwaizumi’s candid pictures that were probably taken by their former teammates. There were pictures that had been taken sneakily, Oikawa and Iwaizumi sharing a small kiss under the massive sakura tree back in school when they thought they weren’t being watched. A selfie taken by Oikawa who was holding up his signature peace sign, eyes crinkled as Iwaizumi gave him a kiss on the cheek... Iwaizumi smiled, that picture had been taken on their first date. Then there were pictures that were taken of the two of them by their families, the boys in their tuxedos from when they graduated... The day that they finally confessed to loving each other, the day everything had gone downhill; the same day Oikawa told Iwaizumi that he was leaving.

_I have loved you since we were 18, long before we both thought the same thing._ _  
To be loved, to be in love_ _._

A stream of other short clips followed, the song still playing in the background. Iwaizumi’s cheeks hurt from smiling. He could just imagine Oikawa sitting in his bed, hunching his tall frame over with his glasses almost threatening to fall off his nose. He’d probably have been biting his lip in concentration like he’d done since he was a kid. All these memories broke the floodgate that Iwaizumi has barely kept up all these years and his heart constricted painfully with the emotions that were running around under his skin.

**_I hope I get to see you soon._ **

After the video had come to a halt, Iwaizumi fell back on his bed, the laptop resting near his head. Pursing his lips, he grew annoyed. After all these years, Oikawa had the nerve to send something like this to him. What was he thinking? Iwaizumi knew Oikawa was selfish, but he never realized how far it stretched. Apparently, it stretched pretty damn far for him to throw all these memories in Iwaizumi’s face. What made Iwaizumi angrier was the fact that he found himself forgiving Oikawa, just like that, because he knew Oikawa had no ill intentions when it came to matters with Iwaizumi. And he was angry that he missed Oikawa, furious that he couldn’t find happiness without the other male, livid that he walked himself to the eye of the storm; calm but never quite safe.

But he didn’t care that his time with Oikawa ended up with him like this, alone in his apartment, living but not _living_. He didn’t care that no one could fill the Tooru sized hole in his life. He didn’t care that he was quite literally miserable right now. Even if Iwaizumi had the chance to go back and change being with Oikawa, he wouldn’t, he would do it all over again because the time they had spent together had been the happiest for Iwaizumi. To the untrained eye, he must have seemed like regular old, broody Iwaizumi but he was happy, elated that he got lucky enough to have someone like Oikawa, even for that little while.

Remembering the other document in the pendrive, he turned himself over to face the laptop once again, double clicking on the document.

Iwaizumi’s eyes went glassy and widened.

A business class plane ticket, for his name.

It was scheduled to go to Buenos Aires, Argentina in two days.

Two days, Hajime had two days to decide if he was going to go at all. Did he want this? Did he want to put himself through this? Being that close to Oikawa and not being able to touch him like he once had? Did he want to be reminded of how beautiful Oikawa was? Did he want to fall in love with Oikawa’s personality all over again?

Hajime knew that whatever he told himself, how much ever he tried to convince himself of reasons on why he shouldn’t go, the pure desperation residing within him would make him pack all of his shit and board that plane anyway. So, Hajime was not going to fight it, he wasn’t a child anymore.

So, within the next two days, Hajime got ready to board his flight set at 1 a.m.

He had packed extra clothes because if Oikawa was still Oikawa, he’d steal Hajime’s clothes. He’d also stuffed some milk bread in there, he knew that Tooru would miss that disgustingly sweet treat of his more than he probably missed his mother. And he’d also packed a necklace, one that Hajime didn’t know if he should actually give to Tooru or not once he met him. Iwaizumi had seen it in passing in California one night on his way back to his dorm and couldn’t resist. He longed to see it hanging off of Tooru’s prettily structured neck. But he never actually had the guts to reach out and send it across, he was too scared, too much of a coward.

He called to bid his parents good-bye for a week before he got onto the plane to Oikawa. His anxiety was through the roof, he almost wanted simultaneously to jump off the plane and hurtle to his death while puking his guts out when he was only an hour away from the Argentinian airport. He hadn’t even told Oikawa he would be coming, didn’t know if Oikawa would pick him up. And the worst part is that if he did come pick Iwaizumi up at the airport, he wouldn’t know what to do. Should he just stand there? Should he run to him? Should he embrace him? Should he kiss him? God, he wanted to, he didn’t know how he would resist. Oikawa’s lips would be inches away from him, he’d only have to lean a little, just a little to get a taste. And Hajime didn’t know if that would add years to his life or take them away.

He found himself having a breathing fit once the plane landed. If Oikawa was here, this would be the first time Hajime meets him after 9 years. He was so starved of Oikawa’s touch and the fact that he’s still not able to forget how hot his skin got wherever they made contact made Iwaizumi thickly swallow air in nervousness.

He collected his baggage and walked over to airport exit.

He looked around and deflated, no Oikawa.

If he was here, there’d be various hordes of girls and boys alike trying to get Oikawa’s signature, Iwaizumi’s only heard stories of just how popular his ex-lover was. Iwaizumi didn’t blame the world one bit for being so obsessed over Tooru, it was only natural.

Sighing sadly, he made his way over to the taxi lot and was about to get in one when he spotted him across the private Airport road.

He was trying his hardest to hide behind his large hoodie, smiling shyly at Iwaizumi. He towered over the average individual. His long legs were suffocating in tight black skinny jeans with rips on his knees, proudly showing off porcelain skin. Hajime recalled how they had wrapped around his waist and he immediately blushed, smiling back.

He stood there, looking at Oikawa, his brain brilliantly blank. He saw Oikawa roll his eyes and he gestured Iwaizumi over with his hand. Hajime snapped out of his reverie and pulled his baggage with him as he crossed the road to where Oikawa was.

His luggage was forgotten somewhere in middle of the sidewalk when strong fingers pulled at his hoodie until he crashed against a rock-hard chest. Holy crap, Oikawa was sturdier than Hajime remembered. He hoped to god Oikawa wouldn’t ever remove his hoodie, Hajime didn’t think a mere t-shirt could stop his imagination from running wild, didn’t think he’d be able to stop himself from touching.

“Hajime.” His voice was breathless as he wound his long arms around Iwaizumi’s middle. His happy hum reverberated against Iwaizumi’s temple, where Oikawa’s neck was. Had he grown even taller?

Hajime let out the breath he’d involuntarily been holding onto before he hugged Oikawa back just as tightly, if not more.

“Thank you, for the gift.” Iwaizumi mumbled into Oikawa’s skin, hands running up and down Tooru’s back comfortingly.

“Hey! Is that Oikawa Tooru?!”

“Oh, fuck.” Were the words that tumbled past Oikawa’s lips as he untangled himself from Hajime’s arms. His fingers found Hajime’s wrist and held it tightly before he pulled Iwaizumi towards a sleek black BMW. Hajime noted how Oikawa had also managed to grab his luggage in the midst of the run-away mission from his fans. He let himself be pushed into the passenger seat and waited while Oikawa worked quickly to put his bags in the boot and get in the driver’s seat to zoom away from the horde of curious onlookers running towards them.

Oikawa’s bountiful laughter filled the whole car, infectiously making Hajime smirk as well.

“You’re welcome, by the way.” Oikawa said, once he calmed down.

“For what, asshole?”

“Rude Hajime, you’re the one that said thank you for the gift.” A Chesire cat grin split across Oikawa’s face.

“Oh fuck you.” Hajime replied, the whole run-away incident made Hajime forget that he’d thanked him.

“Wouldn’t you like to.” Oikawa had stated flatly, his lips still crooked upwards on one end.

Hajime stared at Oikawa’s side profile like a deer caught in headlights. They’d met after 9 years and the first conversation Oikawa wants to have with Hajime is about fucking, somehow, Iwaizumi was not too surprised, just caught off guard. If that’s how he’s going to play, fine.

“I would,” Iwaizumi wasn’t an insecure teenager anymore, he might as well let Oikawa know he’s keeping his options open.

Oikawa only sputtered in response, looking away from the road to spare a glance at Iwaizumi, flashing his blown pupils at him in the process. He gulped, and Iwaizumi saw the motions as clear as day now that his hood was off. Oikawa looked uncomfortable; Hajime instantly felt bad, so he tried to diffuse the tension.

“I brought milk bread.” 

“Really?! Ah Thank you! Oh my god I missed it so much.” His voice was back to being chipper, a genuine smile adorning his spotless face. Iwaizumi noticed the sharper features, Oikawa has gone and gotten himself more attractive than Hajime remembered. His features now reflecting something of a man, not a boy. His lips had somehow gotten fuller, eyebrows thicker, jaw and cheekbones more prominent and hair much calmer. No longer going about in waves on his head, he’d shaved off most of the sides, kept it longer on the top which only helped accentuate his handsome features. Oikawa Tooru was a gorgeous human being, Hajime couldn’t believe they grew up together, had the history they shared, and he most definitely couldn’t believe a person this destined to be loved by the whole world had once genuinely uttered the words “I love you” to Hajime and meant it, couldn’t believe a person like Tooru had cried over leaving Hajime.

“I did, yeah, so where are you taking me first?” Hajime didn’t want to bring up the years they hadn’t been in touch, pushing his sadness down to the Earth’s core.

“First I’m taking you to meet my team! But before that lets get some food in your stomach, I’m sure you’re hungry because knowing you, you probably slept through the whole plane ride and missed breakfast. Brute, Hajime, you’re a brute, always have been.”

“Zip it, idiot, I actually did have breakfast excuse you, but I’m still hungry so food sounds good.”

“Hmm, that’s what I thought.”

Oikawa still managed to sound bratty despite being a 27-year-old, independent, functioning adult. Where’s the maturity?

After grabbing food from the drive thru at McDonald’s they were on the way to the court where Oikawa’s team was apparently meeting up for practice.

“Okay Hajime, they’ll probably be all loud and obnoxious, just a heads up.”

“Eh? I figured, specially being obnoxious, they have you as a captain after all.” That earned Hajime a gentle slap up the head followed by a fake ‘ouch’ from Hajime’s part and soft chuckles from Oikawa.

After they got out the car, Oikawa had bee-lined to where Iwaizumi was and hooked his left arm through Iwaizumi’s right and pulled him inside where loud, sharp thuds were heard; volleyballs hurtling towards the carpeted floor with inhumane speed. My god, so this is what Pro leagues were all about. He couldn’t wait to see Oikawa and his brilliance in action. He was already remarkable to begin with but with 9 more years of training, Hajime safely deduced that Oikawa must be monstrous on court.

Seeing their captain enter the space, the thudding ceased, and everyone’s eyes fell on Iwaizumi’s shorter but broader frame. He felt as though he was being psychoanalyzed by men that looked like skyscrapers, which is pretty much exactly what was happening.

Oikawa’s imminent happiness was apparently affecting everyone’s moods because within minutes, their serious expressions fell away to reveal excited men that flashed their perfect teeth at Iwaizumi. They were all really hot too, in their own ways. Built, sweaty men with pearly smiles, it was like gay paradise to Iwaizumi.

“Everyone! This is Iwaizumi Hajime, my best friend and ex.” Oikawa bellowed proudly next to him in perfect English.

Several greetings filled the court to which Iwaizumi replied to before he turned to Oikawa and glared.

“Oi, why’d you have to say that last part?!”

“What? About you being my ex?” He asked innocently.

Iwaizumi gave him a blank look, humored but a little ticked.

“Well, they know already anyway, and I’m proud I had you once, have you seen yourself in the mirror lately, Hajime?” At that, Iwaizumi’s cheeks went pink and he heard a few wolf whistles thrown their way from the team even though they were speaking in Japanese.

“Fuck off, Tooru you dickwad.” He said, turning his face away from Tooru’s mirthful face.

When he looked back, Tooru had already taken his hoodie off and Iwaizumi didn’t know how he kept a poker face because holy shit, _holy fucking shit_ , what the fuck? Oikawa was wearing his team jersey and it hugged him in all the right places, he saw the panes underneath through the goddamn fabric and he just wanted to die.

Instead of getting down on his knees and begging Tooru to take him back, he crossed his hands over his chest and brooded. Oikawa only chuckled while he walked over to Iwaizumi and slung his arm over his shoulders.

“Anyways, these are my teammates, that’s Joshua our libero, then there’s Mateo my middle blocker...” Oikawa went on, introducing his whole team save for one person.

“And that man right there, the one with the surly face, yeah that’s my ace, Nicolas.” Iwaizumi’s eyes zeroed in on this man. He didn’t smile at Iwaizumi like the rest of them did, he looked like he could give less of a fuck, reminding Iwaizumi of his own self. But Iwaizumi didn’t like how Oikawa said ‘ _my ace’_ , the green monster of jealousy creeped up on him because he had to come to terms with how Iwaizumi was no longer Oikawa’s ace, he was just a best friend, an ex that was tossed away. He needed to calm down, he didn’t have the right to get jealous anymore, he didn’t hold a significant enough position in Oikawa’s life anymore.

They started playing and Oikawa was more of a demon than Iwaizumi had given him credit for. If he worked like a professional back at Seijoh, Iwaizumi couldn’t even put into words how good Oikawa had gotten. It was insane, the way he moved so effortlessly, so gracefully, as if he was born to do just this. His team was a well-oiled machine, all because of Oikawa, Iwaizumi was sure. He could only watch open-mouthed as Oikawa set the ball with precision and timing that gave Iwaizumi goosebumps, the ball made daunting contact with Nicolas’ large palm, booming from the point of contact and ended up on the opposite side of the court within seconds. It made the harshest sound he’d ever heard and if anyone were to make a spike like that back in high school, everyone would still to silence, but this team moved on, played like there was nothing out of the ordinary. Iwaizumi breathed in and let it out, awestruck beyond measure. He was elated for Oikawa, genuinely so happy that his eyes glassed over, Oikawa had found people that were worth his skill, people that could unfalteringly keep up with him.

After practice had ended and Oikawa led him outside the court, freshly showered and smelling like vanilla, Hajime had hugged him.

“I’m so happy for you, Tooru, you... you looked amazing out there and I’m so proud, so proud Tooru.” Iwaizumi hoped he conveyed his love to Oikawa through how intently he was hugging him. Oikawa only huffed a breath and hugged him back.

“Thank you, Hajime, but there’s a lot I need to tell you, let’s go home.”

Hajime nodded, expecting this.

When they got to Oikawa’s house, Hajime unpacked and showered. He put on a thin muscle tee because Argentina was warm, and he wasn’t too used to it. He located Oikawa’s bedroom and walked in, didn’t bother knocking because the door was wide open; a silent invitation.

He sat on Oikawa’s work chair and swiveled around, Oikawa was in his bathroom judging by the running water and clinking.

Oikawa came out minutes later, red faced and teary eyed. Hajime heard his heart shatter and instantly sprang up, reaching over to Oikawa.

“What’s wrong?” He inquired, his arms holding Tooru’s muscled shoulders, peering at the other man’s face, watching as he sniffled and rubbed at his red-rimmed eyes.

“I’m sorry.” And Iwaizumi’s heart melted.

“I know”

“No! No, you don’t! Don’t act like I didn’t hurt you Hajime! I broke us. I was selfish, so selfish...”

“It’s okay, c’mere.” Hajime let his arms bring Tooru closer and nuzzled his head right above his heart, so he could hear Hajime’s steady heartbeat. They’d done this a lot as teenagers, even before they dated, he’d always felt the way Oikawa relaxed in his arms, the way he melted into Iwaizumi’s body. Iwaizumi noticed the king-sized bed that grandly rested in a sparsely furnished room, a space that could comfortably accommodate two people, but was greeted every night with one lonesome man. He imagined Oikawa lying in it, all by himself, small and grieving, reprimanding himself and Iwaizumi hated himself for not noticing the alarm bells earlier.

Tooru was crying badly now, hiccupping and heaving into Iwaizumi’s chest, bent at an awkward angle because he was taller.

“Hey, breath, it’s okay, I’m here now.”

Iwaizumi brought his face up again, all of his previously induced anger from when they didn’t talk dissipating into thin air with one look from Oikawa’s broken expression. He held Tooru’s face in his hands, staring kindly at the other’s honey brown pools. He thumbed at Oikawa’s tears, wiping them away before he moved forward, getting on his tippy toes and kissed his cheek. He felt Oikawa’s lashes flutter shut, his hands covered Hajime’s own where it was holding his face, applying small bouts of encouraging pressure.

Hajime moved them over to Oikawa’s bed, knew that Oikawa needed his warmth, he needed for Oikawa to know that they were okay, that he was forgiven. But selfishly enough, Hajime was happy. Happy because Oikawa still wanted him, this beautiful, talented, hard-working man, wanted him just as must as Hajime still wanted him.

He pulled Oikawa’s heaving frame close to his body and adjusted Oikawa so that he had one of his long legs over Iwaizumi’s hip and put Oikawa’s head back against his chest. He then slowly massaged Oikawa’s head, physically telling Oikawa to get ready for what Iwaizumi was about to tell him.

“You know, I’m not going to lie, I was mad at you, you had the nerve to send me that video after not so much as giving me a call for more than 4 years, Tooru. It was unfair and it seemed selfish. But I know you, when it comes to me you never had ill intentions, so I came. I came to see you because I missed you and I was mad at you, and I wanted to scream at you at the top of my lungs. I wanted to- I wanted to scream about how much I loved you.” A broken sob reached his ears, but he continued.

“You really did break my heart when you left. And then you stomped on it when you started acting so distant, our conversations were so bland it hurt more when I talked to you than when I didn’t. You just seemed so far out of reach, Tooru, and I couldn’t get you back how much ever I tried. But you know what? This was good. You needed to move, Tooru, you and I both know that and somewhere deep in my heart, younger me knew that too. You would never have been happy, Tooru, not fully, volleyball is your life, you needed to take your chance when it presented itself. So, Tooru, I don’t blame you, I don’t blame your ambitions and I don’t blame your decisions. And I forgive you, even though there’s nothing to forgive.”

“Okay?” He asked, running his finger along Tooru’s cheekbone.

“I don’t deserve this; I don’t deserve you.”

“Of course, you don’t, I’m amazing.” Iwaizumi’s attempt at a joke had worked, albeit very slightly. But Tooru huffed out a laugh and swatted at Iwaizumi’s bicep. He then looked up at Iwaizumi’s face, smiling brokenly but intently watching Iwaizumi’s face for any signs of discomfort. Iwaizumi watched Tooru watch him, his lips looked so inviting, but he didn’t know if this was the right time, Tooru was vulnerable and Iwaizumi didn’t want to be the asshole that took advantage of him.

Tooru’s reddened eyes darkened when he saw Iwaizumi looking at his lips, tongue darting out to wet them. Hajime only watched helplessly when Tooru’s eyes flitted down to watch his Adam’s apple bob and came right back up to look at Hajime’s lips.

He moved his head up, _close, too close_ , their lips were a hair’s width apart, almost touching. Hajime felt Oikawa’s breath ghost over his lips and god, he pleaded that Tooru _moved_ , did s _omething_.

Oikawa applied pressure on the hand that was resting on Iwaizumi’s left pectoral and pushed. With a startled gasp Iwaizumi fell back, his back hitting the sheets and suddenly, Oikawa was straddling his hips, both hands gently resting on Iwaizumi’s chest.

Oikawa didn’t show much emotion except for the intensity of _something_ in his eyes that were darkening by the minute. He removed his hands from Iwaizumi’s chest and Iwaizumi only watched, biting his lip as Oikawa oh so gracefully removed his t-shirt. His ab muscles drifted, moving with the motions and if it wasn’t the most mesmerizing view Iwaizumi had seen in his life, he didn’t know what was. Oikawa was painfully pretty, regality didn’t carry him, Oikawa Tooru carried _regality_. He then put both his hands beside Iwaizumi’s head, trapping him in between. Tooru’s triceps moved, crying under the weight of his upper body. Iwaizumi was sure if he bit his lip with any more force, he’d draw blood, because holy shit what is going _on_? His lips were once again hovering over Iwaizumi’s own which were finally released from previous torture, leaving it plumper than before.

Oikawa still waited, breathing scarily even, composed while Iwaizumi’s head was running a mile a minute. It was as if Oikawa was waiting for him, to meet in between.

Fuck it.

Iwaizumi’s hand’s cradled Oikawa’s head and he strained his neck to meet the other’s lips and they fit, so perfectly it made his heart wrench.

They kissed for minutes on end, tears flowing freely between the two, nostalgia bringing out feelings they’d both repressed for years.

They handled each other as if they’d break.

They’d made love like Hajime never thought would be possible. It was slow, hot and brimming with mounds and mounds of love and Oikawa had rode him just right. Curious hands had gently travelled far and wide, exploring every inch of skin. Hajime’s eyes devoured Tooru’s every movement, and his ears merrily accepted all the sounds Tooru had made. How Tooru had graciously tossed his head back in pleasure as his hands gently pushed at Iwaizumi’s abs in slow intervals to help him move, that image is something that very quickly became one of Iwaizumi’s favourite memories. That scenery was something that couldn’t beat the Alps mountain range or the beautiful setting sun from the beaches of Bali. Iwaizumi would remember the night forever, until his dying breath because he’d never connected with another that way, ever before. It wasn’t just bodies that were pulled towards each other, not just lust, not just sex. Nothing like what they had done back when they were just horny teenagers, it was always rushed back then, both parties eager to reach the peak as soon as possible.

Even after they had both fallen over the ledge, their lips still didn’t separate. Hajime kissed Oikawa lips raw.

Oikawa held his face steady and moved away to look at him.

“Tomorrow, I will take you all around the city okay Hajime? And then we’ll come home and do this again.”

“Okay.”

“Oh, and Hajime?”

“Yeah?”

“Give me time until the end of this year, I’m winning gold at Olympics and then I’m moving back.”

“What?!”

“Mmm, don’t try to change my mind about this Hajime, I’ve thought long and hard about this and I can’t live without you, plus volleyball is not running away from me, any league in Japan would be happy to have me considering my experience. It’s always been you following me everywhere, let me follow you for once.”

Iwaizumi grabbed his head and kissed him again, teeth clinking because they were both so happy and couldn’t close their mouths; perfectly imperfect.

“Wait here.” Iwaizumi said before he left Oikawa’s bed, butt ass naked, and walked over to his own bedroom, shuffling about his luggage before he finally located the red box.

Grinning, he walked towards his person, his home.

He thrust the box into Oikawa’s chest, hands immediately wrapped around it. Oikawa threw an incredulous look at Hajime’s face before he opened it.

“I got that when I was in Cali, I had to buy it.”

Oikawa pulled out the necklace from box, the silver ring hanging on it had little stars and shooting stars alike engraved into it. Hajime couldn’t resist buying it, because it reminded him of the nights back in Sendai. Two young boys lying on a roof with their heads resting on their hands, looking up at the glimmering sky above, absolutely mesmerized. It seemed like a lifetime ago.

A single tear fell down Tooru’s cheek and Iwaizumi wiped it off as if on instinct, kissing Tooru’s swollen lips quickly as if to say _it’s okay._

“Put it on me, Hajime.”

“Turn around.”

Hajime clasped it onto Tooru’s bare neck with minimal effort.

Tooru turned to him, eyes full of happiness, the necklace sitting ever-glinting against glowing skin.

Iwaizumi Hajime’s universe was void; save for his sun that was Oikawa Tooru. 

**Author's Note:**

> Iwa: I'm not going to forgive him.
> 
> Also Iwa the minute he sees Oiks: Marry me.
> 
> Ahhh! This is the longest fic I've written and I had so much fun writing it even though I hunched over my laptop for a solid 8 hours. Needless to say, expect more longer fics from me in the future :')  
> Anyways, as always, hope you guys enjoyed and thank you for reading! <3


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